Monday, October 19, 2009


Do you know what your purpose in life is? Do you ever find yourself having a hard time making decisions? Do you know how you fit into God's big picture?

I'm not sure.
I do!
and I'm working everyday to figure that out.

And Day 4 of Esther study this week was a great tool for me use in this quest.

"And who knows but that you have come to royal position for such a time as this?" Esther 4:14

There's some big questions packed into that short verse.

Who knows?

A time such as this?

To put the verse into context. Esther is between a rock and her husband (the king). The king has issued a decree that all Jews will be killed (Esther is a Jew). Her uncle tells her to go talk to the king about it. But she hasn't been summoned by the king in 30 days (there's trouble in paradise) and if she goes without summons, she could be killed.

Esther has a tough decision to make.

Do you ever feel like the weight of the world is on your shoulders and you have to make a decision about it? And quick.

Have those big decisions ever come your way, right when your in the middle of your own crisis?

When life throws us a giant weight and we are in the middle of our own crisis, we are tempted to say, "not me, not now."

But that is God's perfect timing. If is right on schedule. His schedule.

Beth talks about it being hard being thrown a giant sized weight. She says,

"Know the feeling (of being thrown a weight)? So do I. Every giant-sized weight drops into our laps right on schedule. None of our purposes will be fulfilled easily. All of them will require the most difficult decisions we think we can make. Decisions that we may feel will practically kill us. Then God does something miraculous and we become something we are not. That's when "who knows?" becomes "I know!" At some of the hardest times in my life, I have been able to make the more difficult choice out of pure blind-eyed, bent-kneed acceptance that it was somehow part of a greater plan. I was beaten by a conviction that throbbed relentlessly against my strong self-centeredness. As much as my flesh wanted relief, I knew that when all was said and done, I'd sit on that side of glory having much rather fulfilled my calling than served myself all the way to meaninglessness. I had to accept that I was not called to an easy life I was called to a purposeful life."

I've been in the middle of making some tough decisions lately, so I can relate. Mary tweeted this to me awhile back. I saved it because I knew it applied to me and have been working on it for awhile.
Mairs812 To @heididh33 RT @DougBench Your brain doesn't have to believe in your goals at the start. Mairs812 Nothing of any significance was ever accomplished by a realistic person!

While the decision I make will affect my husband, my coworkers, my students, and myself, the choice is not to be about me. It's about Him. It's about His Kingdom.
Beloved, in the times of greatest struggle when you make the Godward decision over convenience, earthly comfort, or carnal pleasure, you too have come to a critical moment in the fulfillment of your destiny. A defining moment. A war is being waged over your head in the unseen realm, and a great cloud of witnesses is cheering you on. You have no idea what is at stake.

Lord, Be near to me as I make these tough decisions. Help me to know that it's not about me. It's not about my comfort. It's about You, Lord. It's all about You. It always has been, and it always will be. Amen.

(I'll be back with more about Who Knows. Soon.)

1 comment:

  1. "It is the glory of God to conceal a matter; to search out a matter is the glor of kings." - Proverbs 25:2

    We were put on Earth to raise our hearts and glorify the God of everything, if we knew His plan, if we knew the bigger picture what glory would be owed to Him? We'd end up taking credit for all of our blessings.

    I'm praying for you and inspired that you are seeking His counsel with these decisions!